Chapter 03 | The Trip – At Sea
As the cadre of ships sailed out of port of Slade, near Bremerle, on April 22, 1778, Wolfgang placed the 2 blankets, 2 straw sacks, and the 3 pillows that he had been given in one of the makeshift cabins below deck, nearby Karl’s gear, and went to explore the ship. He had never sailed on the ocean before, and wondered what it would be like.
Later that day he took his turn on watch. It was more windy than he had expected, and the ship was clipping along briskly. He watched the birds and the occasional fish jump out of the water, and thought that maybe this sailing wasn’t too bad after all. The day passed uneventfully, and even though the sleeping area was very crowded, and even with the smell of not so washed bodies in close quarters, he was able to sleep pretty well that night.
However, the peaceful part passed quickly, and as they sailed through the waters of the North Sea, the challenges of the sea began sooner than any of the recruits had expected. The area they were sailing through was called Mad Dog because it was very stormy and tempestuous. Wolfgang had just finished his watch on deck when the wind began to pick up. The swaying motion of the boat from the rocking sea suddenly caught up with the recruits, and everyone was dizzy, disoriented, and vomiting.
“This place smells horrible, lamented Karl as he laid over the side of his pallet and contributed to the progress of a rapidly filling bucket. Wolfgang felt awful, and wished he had followed the suggestion of one of his new found friends and drank some seawater early. He had heard that that would force you to vomit, but would also steel you from becoming so seasick. Wolfgang felt so bad that he didn’t respond to Karl, but tried to steady himself and stop the retching.
Finally, the tossing subsided, and Wolfgang and Karl lay spent on their pallets. “I can’t believe it,” mused Karl, “first we were lying spoon fashion with four people all last night, having to shout ‘turn now’ so everyone would turn over at the same time, and today we puke our socks off. What a way to start a trip!”
“Man, you sure are right about that, Wolfgang agreed. This is no picnic, and we’ve got a long way to go.” “Why don’t you shut up so I can get some sleep,” whined Ewalt, on a cot nearby. “I only slept an hour last night.” Everyone was on edge-no one felt well-and visions of what was to come were bouncing around in their minds.
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Wolfgang became quiet, and thought about the pickle he was in. In his introspective times like this, he knew that he drank too much, and that he had this strange fascination with taking bets- he couldn’t pass one up. And his temper was sometimes like striking a flint to a pile of dry leaves- igniting with a burst of flame when he least expected it. He knew, deep down, that he had a lot of faults and problems. He had resisted suicide, but he was not happy with the person he had become.
He thought again about the recent letter from Maria. He wondered if her lack of enthusiasm in her letters was because she was still angry about his decision to become a soldier, or whether she had perhaps somehow become interested in Ernst, a grocer who lived nearby. Wolfgang had seen Ernst looking furtively at Maria Margareta, and it seemed to him to have been more than just by accident.
But he tried to erase this from his mind because he had absolutely no real evidence that Maria had returned Ernst’s glances. He knew he was being unfair to Maria, but it was on his mind nevertheless.
And this was all intertwined with Wolfgang’s preoccupation with Ewalt’s secret with Maria Margarita. He kept wondering what had happened, why Maria Margarita hadn’t told him, and whether he would be seriously violating Ewalt’s trust if he just asked Maria Margareta, point blank, in his next letter, “What happened?” But tomorrow was another day, and he tried to erase it from his mind.
As Wolfgang survived the day and prepared to sleep through the night, he hoped for a better, calmer day tomorrow. Sure enough, they sailed quietly into Portsmouth, where they stayed for five peaceful, healing days to supply the ship with provisions and to get ready for the long journey across the Atlantic.
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As they left Portsmouth and sailed on the ocean toward America, the stormy seas welcomed them again.
“Oh, My God!” Shouted Wolfgang, as the Friendship was slammed again and again against waves as high as mountains. “Say your prayers, Karl, because this is the end! We’ll never survive this. We’ll sink to the bottom of the ocean!” Karl was clinging to a post to keep from getting tossed against the sides of the hold, and Wolfgang also held on for dear life. Everyone was crying out in fear, and many, if not all, of the recruits felt their lives were being snuffed out.
Somewhere, maybe from a recruit hanging onto the main mast for dear life, Wolfgang heard “Save me God! I’ll never sin again! Oh God, save me!” Even in this moment of stark fear, Wolfgang had a fleeting thought that the recruit may have been making a promise to God he would not be able to keep. He also noticed that Ewalt, who didn’t even believe in God, was quietly hanging on to a fastened down bunk, and may have been the calmest recruit of all.
The hatches on the ship had been nailed shut, the sails lowered and tied, the booms had been taken in, the rudder tied, and control of the ship had been totally given over to the raging, boiling sea. It was being tossed around like a fishing bobber in a high wind, often under water so far that only the tips of the masts showed.
It is amazing how the mind thinks of so much in such a short time when the body is in extreme physical danger.
As he held on for dear life, Wolfgang’s thoughts turned to his courage. He had been small when growing up, and didn’t get his growth spurt until around age 14. It was his secret how afraid he had been of the neighborhood bullies, and how reluctant he had been to fight them. In truth, he did not like to fight, and yet, here he was on his way to fight for the British against the Colonists.
But he knew he could stand up for himself if he had to, recalling the time when one of the biggest boys in Ansbach had tried to hold his sister against her will, and whose hands were exploring her body while she screamed and tried to free herself. Wolfgang had surprised himself by grabbing the tyrant by the arm and saying “leave my sister alone and pick on me, you skunk- you may hurt me bad, but you’re gonna get hurt too!” Wolfgang had pummeled the harasser while his sister ran away. It wasn’t without pain, but it helped Wolfgang know that he had hidden courage when he really needed it.
And Wolfgang had thought many times about whether he could kill a man in battle. He was by nature peaceful and accommodating, but he signed as a Hessian soldier because he knew, when push came to shove, he could do what he had to.
But now all of his mental preparation for America was about to be for no purpose, since he truly thought that the ocean would devour their ship, and he would just be like a small piece of rice in some giant whale’s stomach after a big meal.
Amazingly, as the rampant ocean continued to toy with the Friendship, a certain calm came over Wolfgang’s being. It was if, “well, it can’t get any worse than this, so I’m resigned to take it calmly, like the man I know I am.”
And also, if for only a fleeting second, Wolfgang again felt the presence of someone or something (A guardian angel?) with him, almost supporting his quiet, calm acceptance. He didn’t dwell on it, but it seemed to give him the courage he needed.
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Almost as soon as Wolfgang had taken a “this, too, shall pass” attitude, the seas began to quiet, and the recruits, from their viewpoint, regained a grasp on their lives that they felt had been beginning to slip. And their leaders wasted no time in organizing a prayer meeting to thank God for getting them safely through the storm. Wolfgang, ever leery of the promises of the power of God, passed up the prayer meeting and spent the time on his wet bunk, pondering where he came from, where he was and where he was going.
Days passed into weeks, and everyone became more comfortable with the interaction between the ship and the ocean.
Wolfgang, Karl, Wilhelm, and Ewalt were joined on several occasions with a recruit from Bayrueth named Conrad. He was a somewhat pudgy, smiling, likeable guy that everyone seemed to want to kid. It was hard not to like Conrad, and somehow, he reminded everyone of their brother, or the brother they never had.
The recruits, with plenty of work to do on the ship, still had time to look out on the ocean and see whales as long as the ship, some of them with horns. These “devil whales” were a subject of much attention and humor, diverting attention momentarily from the long, sometimes boring trip. The recruits were also were fascinated by the flying birds and the giant sea turtles.
“I suppose you think those devil whales are real, Conrad,” said Wilhelm with a big grin. “Didn’t anyone ever tell you that after a few days out to sea, mama’s boys start seeing grotesque things that are only a figment of their imaginations.” “Yeah, said Conrad with a sneaky smile in return, “Not surprised that you’re the first one to know about this, Willy.”
“Look Out!” hollered one of the British sailors, as everyone on topside began to shout- as if they could be heard- at another sailing ship that was heading right at the Friendship. There was nothing they could do… either poor navigating, the wind, or a capricious ocean current propelled the ship Myrtle, carrying troops from Bayrueth, right into the foremast of the Friendship. It was quite a shock when the two ships collided, and was just another event that scared the bejeebers out of the recruits.
Karl, feeling more like his jovial, outgoing self by now, later joked about the event. “I knew that rum was triple strength,” he chortled, “and the captain of the Myrtle must have had three times as much, on top of that.” “What can you expect from a ship named Myrtle?” asked Wolfgang, trying to get in on the act, “I have an aunt named Myrtle, and she can’t even sail a kite.”
The collision had broke off the foremost cutwater of the Friendship, and had torn some stays and lines. The British sailors on the Friendship, who were generally rude to the Hessians, reprimanded Wolfgang and Karl for making fun of the situation. The threat, “You’d better shut your German trap, you scallions, or we’ll have you out there on that foremast making the repairs,” was enough to send Karl and Wolfgang scampering for anonymity, with Wilhelm and Ewalt, who had committed no discernable offense, close behind. Only quite a bit later did Karl and Ewalt sneak back on deck, this time to take a smoke, since smoking below deck was strictly prohibited.
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There was something the matter with Karl. It started with his refusing to eat, and complaining of a very bad headache. Of course, many recruits at times didn’t feel like eating. Some of the food had run out, even after 5 weeks, and partially rotten potatoes were just some of the evidence of the spoiling that was occurring. So the food, to say the least, was not what a King would have ordered.
“Maybe it’s poison food,” Wilhelm hypothesized, “That could cause his problem with the runs. He’ll probably get over it pretty quick.”
Wolfgang wasn’t so sure, and when Karl complained of being tired and weak, worry set in. Karl had been Wolfgang’s best friend since childhood, and always had a relaxed, positive approach to life, along with a lot of energy. Wolfgang had never seen Karl so sluggish.
A couple of days went by, and things didn’t change with Karl. In fact, they got worse. Karl started having hallucinations, and seemed confused. After a severe case of the chills, and a severe nosebleed, he was forced by his friends to seek the help of the ship’s doctor.
Wolfgang didn’t have much faith in the doctor. He had always felt that if you can’t do very well as a doctor in a community, then you doctor on board a recruit ship.
Nevertheless, the doctor, not the brightest lantern in the bowels of the ship, had the advantage of experience. He had seen these symptoms many times, and had awful memories to prove it. He knew that Karl had a serious type of fever, and his worst fear was that it might be typhoid. He told Karl to drink lots of liquid, and gave him some terrible tasting medicine from his bag. He also ordered him to stay on his pallet and get as much rest as he could.
It happened during the 6th week of the trip, when least expected. Wolfgang was talking to Karl about Ansbach, and his family there. They reminisced about their childhood, and Karl even forced a small smile when Wolfgang talked about his tying a cat to a tree, with a string just not quite long enough to allow the cat to reach the bowl of milk that Karl had carefully put in place.
Just then, Karl became delirious, his nose started really bleeding, and he collapsed and thrashed off his pallet onto the floor. Wolfgang shouted for help, and the recruits gathered around the wretching body, almost too shocked to move. “Get the doctor! Get the doctor! shouted Wolfgang, as he began to shake Karl’s now still body, as if trying to wake him up.
It had been too late, and Karl was dead. The dreaded typhoid fever had ever so suddenly taken its toll. Wolfgang was sobbing over the loss of his dear friend, and an uncontrollable sense of sadness and grief came over him. All he could think of was the happy-go-lucky friend in the Black Forest Pub that night when he declared he was going to join the Hessians, and would defeat the colonists and be back in a year.
It is a law of the sea, and the ship’s regulations, that a person who has died on ship must be tossed overboard within 3 days. It was on the third day that Karl’s body was tied to a plank, weighted with a large cannonball, and after a very brief ceremony, thrown over the side of the ship. Wolfgang and his fellow recruits, including Wilhelm and Ewalt at his side, gasped in horror as a giant lobster, that appeared to be over 10 feet long, grabbed the body, plank and all, and pulled it under the surface of the sea. They could see the other claw tearing the flesh, and had to close their eyes, gagging in utter repugnance.
Wolfgang cried himself to sleep that night, lonesome, grieving, and yes, even trying- to no avail- to pray for Karl’s soul. And underneath it all, wishing he had never agreed to join the Hessians.
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Three weeks had passed, and Wolfgang had been very depressed about Karl’s death. He had written Karl’s family, but there was no telling when, if ever, they would get his letter. Perhaps several months from now, when a ship returned from America, a tattered letter would find it’s way to Ansbach, and to Karl’s family. But he wasn’t holding his breath.
Also, Wolfgang and his friends on the ship had spent a good deal of time talking about life, where they were, and where they wanted to be. They also talked about God, and whether or not Karl’s soul had been saved. Today, several of the recruits had been assigned to scrub the deck, and they were talking as they carried out the task.
Wilhelm, who was probably the most religious among them, said “I think Karl gave his life to God when he became sick, and his Father in Heaven has made a place for him. All is well.” “Oh shit” exclaimed Ewalt, who had just joined the group, “If you believe that, I could sell you anything. Karl is just gone. The lobster has eaten him, and he is no more. I don’t know why people can’t accept that.” Wilhelm, who had become close to Karl on the trip, looked at Ewalt and asked, “ Do you think that birth could happen without a God? And if a God causes birth, don’t you think he would take care of you in death? I think Karl is in God’s hands.” Wolfgang had been so confused about his beliefs about death in days since Karl died that he could not bring himself to speak. But he knew that this was something he had to get sorted out. Conrad, the newest member of the group had not known Karl all that well, but felt a strong sadness knowing he was gone.
Just then, a young sailor on top of the mast shouted “land ho!” and everyone on ship was jumping with excitement. Even though the wind conditions had been very favorable, the ship had sailed along at a faster than normal speed, and it was a shorter sail across the Atlantic than usual, the 9 ½ weeks had seemed like a very long time. What a wonderful thing, to arrive in America!
But the joy was short lived, when the navigator reported that they had sighted Quebec, in Canada. But it should not be long before they sailed into New York harbor, so the anticipation remained high! However, little did any recruit know that their trip wasn’t even half over!
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Many years later, of all the things Wolfgang could remember about his past, the next three months on board the ship, camped in the St. Lawrence river, and waiting orders to sail to New York Harbor, was the one most blotted out of his mind. The captain of the ship could not dock on land at either here or in New York because official orders had not been given to allow this to happen.
When this was first reported to the recruits, they thought that it would be just a few days delay, and they would proceed to New York. But as the days wore on, they realized that orders would probably have to come from the British naval officials, and that meant waiting for a ship to cross the Atlantic to Great Britain, and return. The grim reality had set in.
Waiting alone would have been bad enough, but put on top of that the awful conditions on the ship… food running out, a filthy smell that wouldn’t seem to go away, serious concern about stopping any spread of the dreaded fever, as well as extremely frayed nerves… and you have an almost intolerable situation.
This was the condition the recruits found themselves in for the next 12 weeks, and even though the food problem was solved by food brought on board from the local area, many of the other conditions persisted.
Even though the recruits were given many duties on board the ship to keep them occupied, Wolfgang had a lot of time to think. He continued to talk a lot with Wilhelm, and in the absence of Karl, he continued to talk with Ewalt- and kept hoping that he would spill the beans about Maria Margarita.
He yearned to see his family, but knowing this was impossible for a long time to come, wished for the time when he would get a letter from them, and hear how they were doing. Was his wife feeling better… and her love for him renewed? Were Georg and Maria Magdalena growing up as good children, or were they choosing friends who would get them into trouble? He began to imagine all sorts of things, and, pulling himself up short, realized that he couldn’t think like this. He had to get rid of his depressed feeling about Karl’s death, and had to think the best about what was happening to his family.
Wolfgang had never been much of a worrier, and he didn’t want to start it now. His talks with some of his fellow recruits had caused him to vaguely entertain the thought that it might help him recover his life by taking God more seriously. But he didn’t seem to know how to make this happen, and God seemed too distant, if he existed at all.
It was out of this state of deep introspection that Wolfgang awakened when Ewalt came racing below deck and shouted, “ We’re cleared to sail into New York port! We’re leaving this hell-hole today! Halleluiah!”
Excitement began to build throughout the ship, and everyone was on deck, talking about what was to come. They had been so cooped up for so long that they were ready for adventure- any adventure- as long as it would be a change from the God-awful ship.
After setting sail, it only took a few days, and late in the afternoon, from the top of the mast, a sailor shouted, “Land! Land! Thank the Lord, I see Land!”
Wolfgang and his fellow recruits had been on the ship for 22 weeks, had had many harrowing experiences, and were totally fatigued and frustrated, but this all began to change as they sailed into New York Harbor to come to port at Long Island. They were amazed at the beautiful city of New York, and the pleasant land surrounding it.
Upon entering the harbor, they could not yet know that there were more than 6000 houses in New York, and along with 18 churches, many other places of worship. But they might have been able to see Saint Paul’s church, perhaps the most beautiful, and may have wondered how people who worshipped, just like them, could be so hated by the British.
But they had arrived! And they looked forward to showing their bravery in battle, and to demonstrate, in this faraway land, that the German troops had a special courage. Indeed, they would have plenty of opportunities to do this.
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Maria Margaretha had kept busy. The kids needed her, and she needed them. Being quiet, and somewhat of a loner, she had only a few close friends at church, and she was frustrated that she had not had much time to spend with them, with all the things going on with Georg and Maria Magdelena.
From the calendar she had been keeping, she knew that Wolfgang had been gone almost a year now, and she wished he would come home. But her women’s sense of how time passes told her that his return might be a long time coming, and shedding some tears, she thought- if at all. She had mulled her situation over and over in her mind, and it was driving her crazy. She had been left with the sole responsibility for two emerging teenagers, and her husband was in a far-away land, fighting a war that, from the little news she could find, had no end in sight. Sitting on her small porch by herself, she wept silently, and again, as always, tried to divert her attention to the immediate tasks at hand-to momentarily forget.
So she decided to shop for groceries, and get something ready for two hungry children who would be home from school before she knew it. As she was picking up the meat of the week from the counter, she was surprised to see the widow Konig, shopping nearby. “Hello, Mrs. Konig, Maria said in greeting, “I hope you are having a good day.” Adala Konig, whose husband had been killed several years ago in a freak farm accident, peered at Maria, and said, “Maria, it’s good to see you- it has been a long time.”
Maria always felt a tinge of guilt when she saw Adala, because she was the mother of a boy, Ewalt, with whom Maria had gone to school. Ewalt knew something about Maria that no one else knew, and had sworn to her, almost on a Bible, that he would never tell a soul that dark secret. Maybe she knows, thought Maria, but she had to assume otherwise.
“How is Ewalt?” Maria asked Adala quietly, “ I haven’t heard about him and what he is doing for a long time.” “Well, that is part of my sadness these days,” Adala Konig lamented, “Ewalt joined the Hessians to fight for the British in the Colonies. He’s been gone almost a year, and without him, I am all alone.”
Maria was surprised to find that Ewalt had left with the Hessians in the same battalion as Wolfgang, and that they were fighting together. The tinge of guilt returned, and with it, it’s companion, worry. “What if he tells Wolfgang,” she thought, flooded with a sense of fear- and her frustration with Wolfgang’s choice to join the Hessians was compounded.
After listening for awhile, and telling Adala that Wolfgang and Ewalt were in the same battalion, Maria could see that Mrs. Konig was immensely relieved. Someone was there to help and support her son! As they took leave of each other, their thoughts about their encounter, and the news they learned, could not have been more different.
On the way home, Maria’s mind kept returning to her plight, and as had happened so often in the past year, but this time it was the worry and guilt that took center stage. Maybe I am blowing it out of proportion, she thought, and should just forget it. But she couldn’t. She was all too aware that Ewalt Konig, who had sworn to keep her secret, would have plenty of stressful occasions to let it slip- and that would be devastating. Her headache, which seemed to come upon her more often these days, returned again.
“Why so sad, Mom,” 10 yr old Georg asked with an inquisitive look, “did the cat run away?” “Or maybe it was my sister who ran away- I don’t see how you could be sad about that.”
Maria Margareta looked at her son, who was growing taller, and looked more like Wolfgang every day, and let a tiny smile play on her mouth. The humor of this child, no matter how telling, was always something that perked Maria up a little.
“Where have you been, Maria Magdalena?” Maria said, looking at the clock and calculating that her daughter, who would be a teenager next summer, was almost an hour late for supper. “What are you worried about, Mom? I can heat up the stew, and it’s OK.” “Not OK,” said Maria with conviction, What were you doing to be so late?”
It was difficult to get a straight answer from Maria Magdalena, but it seemed that she had walked home with a friend who was a boy, and they had taken a little detour. Maria, her mind turning to a night long ago when she was Maria’s age and with a boy, was visibly unhappy about the situation, and it seemed that troubles were piling upon troubles for her.
Just as the words between mother and daughter had a strong potential to get pretty heated, there was knock on the door that diverted the argument.
“Hello, Ernst,” Maria said matter-of-factly, recalling that she had spoken to him at his grocery store earlier, “What brings you out this way?” “Nothing earth-shaking,” Ernst said quickly, “Just bringing some groceries to Rein Greber, and stopped by to tell you that I could come over Sunday to help fix that leak in your roof you told me about, if you want.” “Ernst, that would be so kind of you,” Maria said with genuine gratitude, “If we have a heavy rain, we could be in real trouble. Would you be able to have dinner with us before you do the repair?” “I would like that,” Ernst replied shyly, “ See you on Sunday.”
Maria was pleased to have help with tasks around her house that she didn’t feel very confident tackling. “The least I can do is to serve him dinner,” she thought. She didn’t want to open old wounds and knew some neighbors would talk, but she rationalized that Ernst was from her church, he was older now, and that his offers to help were a part of his church mission.
Maria went to bed that night pondering her life, her guilt, her frustration, and her future. She went to sleep thinking she should write a letter to Wolfgang. She thought about not mentioning Ewalt, but her curiosity about whether Wolfgang had talked to him superseded that thought.